Archive for the Depression Category

The Hardest Thing I have Ever Had To Endure

Posted in Blogging, Cemetery, Death, Depression, Future, Grief, Losing A Parent, Loss, Love, Personal Crisis, Relationships on October 25, 2019 by Morguie

I’ve managed to survive more than a few “worst days of my life” in my half-century (plus) on this planet.

None of those horrific events could begin to prepare me for what would be the end of my world as I knew it.

On June 11, 2019 I lost my loving and devoted sweetheart of 22 years, LeeRoy Halley. The love of my life, the king of my heart, the very center of my little universe, and my world… had left me behind. Today I am pretty much in the same emotional and overall personal condition I was on June 11. I am utterly lost. I wish I would stop breathing.

I can’t believe he is gone forever. Everything we had planned for our near and far-flung future… everything we lived from day to day, the routine and the mundane — all of everything in our life together had been wiped clean from our slate of the life we built and shared for 22 years. ALL of it was GONE. FOREVER. And, if I ever needed my mother’s calm assurances and sage advice, it was really needed now. But, she, and my father, and other support lines I’d come to depend upon through my lifetime…all were gone. I have never felt so ALONE in my life as I do now.

I have my two precious daughters and my sister. But, as many of you know, there’s only so much you can unload on your friends and family when it comes to the painful and relentless grief over such a personal loss. So I keep myself here. At home. I go out ONLY when I must. And of course I go to the cemetery to spend time with him there. I just don’t care about much.

My readers will recall my last visit in here to post on my blog… just a little over a year ago, when my beautiful, beloved Mother passed away in 2018. That was a loss I’d never imagined would be so hard to overcome. I know, I threatened to return to tell you some wonderful things about my mom’s life. And I never did. I didn’t come back because I just felt mired in my grief and then the ensuing legalities placed in my hands regarding my duties to execute her will and deal with her trust. I just couldn’t bear to return, just yet.

Shortly after she died, in fact, it was on Thanksgiving Day of 2018, my cousin (son of my mom’s brother) died unexpectedly. We grew up together. He was a few years younger, so I was quite shocked over his death. I did my level best to assist my uncle and aunt with the funeral plans and to be by their side as they struggled to overcome the incredible shock and grief that they found themselves in. So, I was thinking 2018 was a really sucky year.

As sad as I’d been over the loss of mom, not even that comes close to the utter devastation and deep depression I find myself struggling through since my LeeRoy’s death.

So, I come back to my blog to appeal to my dear friends and readers, with much humility and sorrow. I humbly ask only for your friendship, mercy, and compassion. I need the comfort of those good people who have kindly shared their own sufferings with me and found some small bit of wisdom or perspective in my writings.

Funny, the words of my writings seem helpful enough… but they fall short of helping me through what has been the very darkest hours I have ever had to face. So, now that my life seems devoid of ‘responsibilities’ I once had: caring for and sharing life with my man, planning and plotting out our days together, and keeping our schedules and home-fires going…I have decided that maybe returning to producing some works for this blog might prove to be cathartic or helpful in moving me toward the next phase of my life….because I really haven’t been able to do that yet; not at all.

This will be my start…peace and love to you all.

 

A Super-Important Message For Our Readers

Posted in American Military, Death, Depression, Friendship, Gratitude, Grief, Heroism, History, Holidays, Hope, IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT, Legacy, Life, Loss, Memorialization, Patriotism, Personal Opinion, Politics, Readers Opinion, Remembrance, Soldiers, Tragic death, Veterans, WAR with tags , on November 12, 2014 by Morguie

 

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W A R N I N G:  Mild expletives and strong tone are contained in this very important message.

 

Shit is about to get real in here today, and we NEVER, EVER plan to reiterate this message or revisit the reasons we felt forced to post it.

 

Message To ALL of Our Readers:

After much thought and consideration, we have decided to address a situation which came about, by way of a comment from a reader.  The situation: a reader decided to take a considerable amount of time to make a comment which we considered to be very strongly inflammatory, abrasive, and likely to offend others who come here… in light of the fact this person chose Veteran’s Day and Remembrance Day to make this rant, we have decided to file this particular visitor under the “Flamethrower” tab in our Rolodex. The comment has been placed HERE and not marked “approved” in its original location. http://wp.me/p3m3ZG-1Vv

Why do we even give him the attention he obviously craves, you ask? 

We are giving him a center-stage role here today to make something of an example, to others who may be able to learn more about US, what this blog is about, who runs shit here, and what and who will or won’t be welcome or tolerated here. We really haven’t had to worry about doing this before now.  We feel now is the time to make a CLEAR statement. Crystal.Clear.

 

 Otherwise, known as the Rules of Engagement; we reserve the right to make them, break them, stretch them, or jettison them. W E.

BUT,

before we entertain this comment and give the stage up to ‘mytiturk’, we first want to be sure our loyal, gentle, and extremely appreciated followers and readers know this:

Morguie and I absolutely adore all of you. We are truly honored to be thought of as worthy of your time, your friendship, your interest, and the love you have shown us. Without you, this effort and our hope to make this blog into something unique and personally rewarding would have been a failure for us in more ways than one.

An epic failure.

We might even go as far as to say YOU may have possibly even saved our lives…it’s not quite THAT dramatic, perhaps…unless you consider the dark days we were living in the beginning of this venture. Depression over the need to ‘re-invent’ ourselves after an office closure forced a lay-off which had turned into ‘long-term’ unemployment (in spite of having a wide array of skills, experience, achievement, certifications, licenses, and education). Never having had to worry about being out of work was something we never thought we’d experience. Always worked; found we were excellent at managing to adapt and learning new, valuable skills along a life-time of great work environments, career fields, etc.  This blog pretty much saved us from the worst depths of despair, in short. We always knew we could put words together — been told over the years by a great many that we had a real talent for putting pen to paper.  We didn’t know. What we did know was that we had to find a way, some way, to get out of the pit of doom and hopelessness we were in. With the encouragement and support of only those closest to us, we jumped in with both feet.*      * CJ had Morguie in a pocket so HIS feet didn’t count 😉

What was once just a pipe-dream — to someday earn a bit of success or feel some personal accomplishment— has been to become a real author or writer. The silly little dream became a goal and now, a reality…almost entirely thanks to YOU.  Our plan was to step off in this arena and build connections and confidence, so that we might be able to gain the attention of someone who thought we deserved a shot at trying our hand in an even bigger arena: somewhere in a bona fide, recognized place and PUBLISHED place. We can proudly say, that has happened* — it would never have happened without this blog and more importantly, YOU.    *NOTE: CJ has been a monthly featured contributing author of her own column in “Mortuary Management” magazine, since December 2013…with over 10,000 subscribers, the magazine is a trade publication of distinction for 100 years, for funeral professionals, allied trades and service providers of death care related products and

You see, this blog was born at a time of great instability and personal fragility. If not for our friends here, it wouldn’t have gotten off the ground, much less enjoyed well over 500 followers and over 10,000 hits in the 18 months it has been here. To us, this is something we have become quite proud of. Many readers here are also bloggers…bloggers who have stats that make us pale in comparison…and accomplishments far beyond our own. Some are prolific book writers and published artists. We just want ALL of OUR CHERISHED FRIENDS to know we owe you so much..”thank you” doesn’t begin to express our gratitude and love for you.

 

NOW…we present the flamethrower, who, as we said, chose to make THIS comment on a post concerned with honoring our Veterans around the world. It doesn’t deserve a place on our blog, but at the same time, we want to show that we do indeed respect the fact that people are entitled to their personal opinions. We understand that we won’t always share the same feelings, beliefs, or ideas that others may have. We try never to step onto thin ice with subjects of deeply controversial issues…matters which pit people against each other.

WHY?

1. That isn’t our objective. 2. It results in hostility, ill-will, and often leads to destructive, despicable behaviors. 3. It serves no valuable purpose. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY:     WE RUN SHIT HERE. THIS IS OUR BABY, OUR CANDYSHOP, OUR “Thing.” WE don’t welcome anything or anyone who comes in here with the sole purpose of pissing people off or otherwise causing a load of hate and discontent.

 

If anyone finds our policy in contradiction to their liking or intentions within our site, we respectfully suggest that this is not the place to visit. There are literally MILLIONS of other websites and bloggers in cyberspace…there are sure to be much more suitable to your tastes and pleasure.

 

 

Preface: The comment may have been acceptable to us IF the tone (actually the OMISSION of them would have been far better)  of the very last 3 sentences of the rant hadn’t felt to us like an attempt to bully, intimidate, or lambaste  us for our support and observance of what is to us, a special day honoring our military for the work they do to free other people from the oppression and tyranny of evil governments and the despots ruling them. THE LAST 3 SENTENCES were ugly and intended to cause a shit-storm, in our opinion. (Marked with * *)

WAR IS A PART OF Real life . We make no excuses for why they happen. Our soldiers have nothing to do with causing them as they carry out orders and do battle as directed. Yes, unfortunately all kinds of innocent people are killed and it is a horrible tragedy. People who proclaim them only to be about taking resources away for the spoils are obviously in sore need of a REAL education of the world’s history.

‘mytiturk’ spews his vitriol safely , THANKS to others who had the balls to defend that right and even give up their lives so the a-hole coward wouldn’t have to live in fear for speaking his piece. That is the extent of our response to this person’s comment. (BTW, The post he was directing comment to wasn’t our own, it was a re-blogged piece from another writer)

So to be clear:  THIS IS OUR POLICY over OUR BLOG.

RULES: We reserve the right to make them, break them, stretch them, or jettison them. WE. Period. Thank you. We also will not tolerate any commentary which serves to create any further vitriol in this particular post. If there is anybody wishing to blast us, you are wasting your energy — find something to read at some other site. It is silly to hang around here for such a reason. It makes you look like an asshole, too.

 ‘mytiturk’ says:

‘The very statement that soldiers die to protect something like “our freedoms” assumes that the majority of wars entered into by a country are simply protecting the freedoms of its people. In fact, the vast majority of wars are about securing power or precious resources for the country that wages them. The individual soldier’s pathos and heroism (never in doubt) is used to silence those who oppose war. “To oppose war is to diminish the goodness and sacrifice of the hero. How can you do that?” The planet cannot sustain the insane scale of world resources allocated to killing. The more immoral, greedy wars we wage, the more we need to keep these “freedoms” illusions in the front of the population’s “consciousness.” It shuts up the person who sees through the hypocrisy and shuts down dialogue. The tragedy is in the incredible, diverse sufferings of those good, simple people who wage these immoral foreign wars and die or return with untold physical and emotional wounds – and in the far larger numbers of the “enemy” who are harmed. One example: 500 000 Iraqi children died due to the sanctions applied during the decade of “peace” between the two Iraq wars – sanctions that destroyed Iraq’s ability to purify its water supply and prevented medicines from entering that country. If, somehow, there were a light at the end of this immoral tunnel, a Malthusian might justify it on selfish grounds. The irony is that militarization is not going to have any long term winners. **So spare me the glorification of war at every major sports event and the callous exploitation of our own soldiers’ to continue the race to oblivion. Remembrance Day itself is being used to feed the naive patriotism that feeds the profitable War Machine. If we truly loved our soldiers we would not treat them as a renewable, disposable commodity and churn them out like car parts.’

 

So to the Flamethrowers, we invite you to our furnace, or you can just get OUT. Trolls are not welcome here. 

Our Love, to the rest of you fine people…  CJ and Mousie

©2014, C.S.Thompson.

The mini incinerator

Crackers and Bits: Hardest I’ve Laughed, EVER!!!!

Posted in Comedy, Crackers and Bits, Depression, EPIC HUMOR -, Guest Post, HILARIOUS ENOUGH TO BE A HEALTH HAZARD, Humor, Laughter, OFF THE CHART- DIE LAUGHING, Video Clips on June 29, 2014 by Morguie

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crazycat

CHESTER, the mortuary dipstick of dumbness

MORGUIE

MORGUIE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hey, everybody!!! I’m baaaaackkkkkk! I believe I have outdone myself in an epic way…you’ll not believe

the insanity I found to unleash upon the globe…BAR NONE, THE MOST INSANELY HILARIOUS THING I HAVE

EVER IN MY LIFE SEEN. I  CANNOT REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I LAUGHED THIS HARD!

 

IT WAS ALMOST TOO MUCH TO BEAR, PHYSICALLY!   I AM KEEPING THIS!!! Forever. I just found the most perfect antidote for the blues.

 

 

ENJOY!

 

Crackers and Bits: “Dear Diary”

Posted in Animals, Comedy, Crackers and Bits, Depression, Friendship, Guest Post, Humor, Pets, Video Clips on June 19, 2014 by Morguie

Awwww….lazy kitty feels sorry for himself.

Morguie says: “Meh! Get Over Ya’self Already, Will Ya? Shheeesshhh!”

Thanks for coming by to participate in the Kitty’s Pity Party!

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MORGUIE

MORGUIE

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